Why Does The Universe Hate Me?

Murphy's Law should be renamed JoAnn's Law because if something can go wrong in my life, it will go wrong.  

Why should my recent surgery be any different?

Since I started walking on my own two months ago, I have been walking on the outside of my foot.  Even with physical therapy, I have great difficulty taking a step with my right foot flat on the ground.  My PT and I just thought it was a matter of re-training my muscles and my brain to walk normally.  

I have recently found out that that is not the case.

A few days ago I went to my surgeon to get clearance to go back to work.  I told him that I just couldn't walk flat footed and that my foot always rolled to the outside.  I walk on the outside of my foot so much that my first two toes don't even touch the ground!  

It was after I got a CT scan that I learned that my surgeon over corrected my arch.

You read that right...he OVER corrected my foot.  

Surgery is the only possible cure.  

And when you have no medical leave left and haven't gotten a pay check in four months, you kinda have to go back to work.

I am sickened and devastated.

I feel like the last four months of pain and suffering 

were a waste of time.

I am in more pain than before my surgery.

And I won't be able to do anything about it until after the new year.

For now my job is letting me be on light duty, but that won't last forever.  I may have to find a new job...a desk job, because walking is more painful to me than eating glass!  

I really am lost, anxious, and scared to death that I will never be able to walk again normally and without pain.  Also that I will not be able to support my family.  I try to put on a happy face and tell everyone that "I'm fine."  It's just easier than explaining this all over and over again.

So if you see out and about, please don't ask how I'm doing.

I'm tired of lying.